Posts Tagged ‘denver nuggets’

The Dallas Gag-ricks

May 11, 2009

First off, it’s not all the refs fault.

Laying it out there now.

Go ahead and close the window, i don’t care.

I already got your hit which is so very important to me.

But if you care to be enlightened, i can tell you why the gags deserve this name.

3 points:

1. Missing free throws in the last minutes of the game.

2. Going away from the offense that worked throughout the third and early fourth.

3. Not playing through the whistle.

4. Dirk can’t jump straight up/poor 3-pointer selection and overall shot selection.

Okk there are 4, but only because the 4th came to mind while i typed the other three.

so to address number one, free throws.

Free throws are the most basic shot in basketball besides a layup.

That is the only shot besides a layup you shoot your whole life.

3 pointers are out of the question when you’re 6.

And they are FREE throws.

No defenders, at your own home court, and the 3 highest percentage shooters on our team miss 3 big ones in the last half of the quarter.

ohhhhhh wahhh only 3 free throws missed.

Wouldn’t you enjoy those extra 3 points now after the game?

How about just one?

Dirk, who shoots about 91%, terry, who shoots near 80%, and j-ho, who shoots 83% all missed free throws when it counted.

Sure, we went 40-49 and shot 81% for the game, butĀ  3 of those misses were in crunch time.

Gotta get those gimmies when you’re given them.

Cool line huh?^^

2. In the third and 4th quarters, we were pouring in points.

Almost every possession resulted in a basket, no matter how many offensive rebounds we got.

we put in 35 points in the third, which was more than the nuggs had in any quarter.

Going into the last 6 minutes of the fourth, we were rollin’.

But then the offense switched from layups, dunks, and free throws to jumpers.

The old maverick curse.

A jumpshooting team is always a jumpshooting team when it’s true identity is revealed.

Pretty philosophical, i must say.

3. I know antoine thought he fouled him, and it looked like he did.

But never stop until the whistle is blown.

You also learn that as a kid.

Maybe you should follow Jon Barry’s advice and let the ref know you’re gonna foul him, and not complain to the ref while your offensive assignment fires up a wide open three.

Just a suggestion.

and 4. Dirk can’t jump straight/poor shot selection.

The second half of this goes with the changing of the offense point.

But a problem i have with Dirk is his unclutchness along with his inability to jump straight upwards on a jumper instead of straight backwards.

Doing this would make the shot much easier, conisdering he’s higher and closer, and require less effort.

He also makes it easier to block if he goes straight back.

If he goes straight up, he might get fouled and even make the shot.

Then he’ll get two points and it doesn’t matter if he chokes at the free throw line.

So tonight the gags go out to remain a little shard of dignity and hopefully not get swept.

So it’s not all the refs fault…


End of Year Awards/ Playoffs

April 16, 2009

I’m gonna do a mondo combo blog on the important end of year awards and playoff predictions.

I’ll start with the important one.

Most Improved Player.

the MIP

Although kevin durant was good last year, he does it all this year.

steal, blocks, scores, assists, and scores on the oklahoma city thunder warnings.

only other competitior is devin harris

went from a decent player to a franchise guard.

Devin Franchise.

it works

Coach of the Year:

Mike Brown?


watching lebrawn do what he do must be sooooo rough.

i’m sorry, do you want me to fan you or anything else while you wait?

how about a coach that did something

Rick Adelman.

took a potential trash team that traded their starting pg and lost tracy mcgrady and his lazy eye.

and they still made the 5 seed and have a great chance of upsetting portland.

but they won’t

Defensive player of the Year:

Dwight howard?


Chris “the Birdman” Andersen?


2.5 blocks a game, and isn’t inconsistent like howard, who either gets 7 or 0

birdman gets 2.5 every night

and how does he get half a block?

don’t worry about it.

6th man

jason terry

it was basically a race to try and talk to terry at the award ceremony as the 2nd man.

2nd? how about TO

travis outlaw.


Derrick Rose is an attractive pick, but not attractive looking.

Brook Lopez is an ugly ogre.

OJ Mayo and Russell Westbrook are beasts, but not quite leaders.

and Eric Gordon only scores.

Derrick by a shaved hair over oj.

If you have a foam finger in this picture, you're ugly. Sorry

If you have a foam finger in this picture, you're ugly. Sorry

and now to the mv3

sorry, mvp

if you want my pick, its d-wade

if u want america’s biased pick, its bron bron

no dis to bronny, but again,

you know how i feel about this.

Now to the playoffs:

Lakers vs. Utah.

Boy do i want utah to win, but lakers are too good.

lakeshow in 6.

Denver vs hornets.

Denver is pretty good, but c-piddy is a beest.

Denver in 7.

San Antone vs Dallas.


dallas in 7.

Portland vs houston

basically a toss-up, i say portland cuz i love brandon roy.

Lakers vs portland

lakers in 4.

dallas vs denver

denver in 5

and then denver beats the lakers in 7 to get to the finals.

now to the east.

cleveland in 4.

doesn’t matter who they play

boston scrapes by chicago, in 6.

orlando beats philly in 6.

Miami Dwyane Wade’s win over atlanta in 6.

i love atlanta, but i think d-wade carries them.

bron vs wade is a great matchup

but bron and his real team wins in 5.

boston loses to orlando because of dwight in 7.

cleveland takes out dwight and the mag in 5.

cleveland vs denver

nobody picked it but me

i like denver and the way they play, but they just can’t get cold.

cleveland in 7.

classic series

and bron and melo duel it out so it’ll be tight.

good job bronny

Birdman Daddy

March 30, 2009

pullin up in that brand new caddy.

Sorry, just finished off the line because i had to.

Now this is not the rapper birdman, although this birdman could definitely rap very very well.

This is the birdman that has jumped around (literally) from new orleans to denver.

I see you LeBrawn.

I see you LeBrawn.

I have no clue why anyone would drop this guy.

Denver is lucky to have him, no matter how they did get him.

He is a block machine, has swag, and can even put in points on sweet dunks on offense.

This. Is. The. Birdman.

notice the wings on his inner biceps.

notice the wings on his inner biceps.

I just had to full-size that mug.

It’s a wonder to look at, and it makes me want to be him.

In the game against Dallas friday night, he had 3 blocks on ONE POSESSION.

One was a good one, the second one was just batted because wright just tossed it up 3 feet to the left of the basket, and the third was another good one on a drive.

The second one shouldn’t haveĀ  been swatted, and maybe grabbed by the Birdman.

But instead, his swag instinct got “in the way” and knew that if he swatted that one, he would get a chance to swat the third one.

After the third swat, his team got a fastbreak.

He even hurt himself after the first block, and used it as a diversion to swat the last 2 shots.

He’s even a genius.

He’s a dunk contest contestant.

Anyone that even gets in the contest gets my attention.

And the swag-tastic swat he had on Rudy Fernandez that led to his “My Dougie” celebration cemented him as a legend in we like sportz history.

So as a future fantasy superstar, a swag leader like Eric Devendorf, and a force inside on both sides of the court leads him to the top of the pack of centers next season.

Even over D-wight Howard.

Sorry d, but how can you go against this?

you can't

you can't

You can’t

oops, i said that twice.

Well i meant it twice.

So deal with it sista.

Yes, I’m assuming you’re all girls that read this.

Louis Amundson

March 26, 2009

As i sit here with my Sacajawea one dollar coin, i looked at the espn bottomline.

and i see that nene (no accent needed) head-butted Louis Amundson of the suns


oh yeah, that guy who got into ANOTHER FIGHT with zach randolph

why is this young male always involved in the fights, especially being the one getting owned??

Is it because he’s jealous of his all-star teammate,

Goran Dragic that is…

no, he’s not

is he a trash-talker, and a baiter, like bruce bowen?

no, and i hate bruce bowen.

"i'm a dirty player, i kick people in the face, and punch them in the nuts'

"i'm a dirty player, i kick people in the face, and punch them in the nuts'

the reason louis amundson always gets owned in these NBA fights is this:

drum roll…….

get excited…….

it’s because he’s ugly.

this is a perfect time to use the quote from stepbrothers:

“I don’t know what it is about your face, but god damn -holds up fist- i just want to deliver one of these right to your suck hole.”

It’s when randy says that brennan’s face is so ugly he just wants to beat it to a pulp.

Zach randolph had the same approach when he “punched” him in the face.

punch is in quotes because apparently if zach “had actually punched him, he’d be out for the count”

I like to hear that, it’s funny.

but its not funny that they pick on the ugly guys in the NBA.

Roger Goodell, yes Roger Goodell, not david stern, needs to get in this.

i only capitalize Roger Goodell, not stern or selig, they can deal.

It’s because Roger has a dictator-like “rule” over his league, and he should “rule” all sports league.

Poor louis amundson, maybe he should get less ugly.


Too much, don’t forget, he plays on the suns and he sucks.

My reccomendation, you ask?

he needs to wear a mask.

not a rip hamilton mask, you can see through that.

not lucious harris either, you could see through that, and he also sucked.

i remember one time in the playoffs he took it off in desperation during a timeout to maybe bring some luck on his next shot. he missed, and the nets lost. sweet d00d

i remember one time in the playoffs he took it off in desperation during a timeout to maybe bring some luck on his next shot. he missed, and the nets lost. sweet d00d

He needs to wear the V for Vendetta mask.

That’d be epic.

And we’d never have to see his ugly face!


that many wins.

he looks like he belongs in hanson. that's not good, that makes him ugly

he looks like he belongs in hanson. that's not good, that makes him ugly