Posts Tagged ‘chicago white sox’

Bobby Jenks is a nazi

May 12, 2009

So i read today that Bobby Jenks of the chi-sox was fined for a purpose pitch.

and i proceeded to read into it.

Turns out B-jenkz was fined a whopping $750 for throwing behind ian kinsler of the texas rangers.

I know, 750 is a lot to anyone reading this blog, but to people this is about, 750 is like buying an all you can eat buffet at cici’s.

Now i’m craving cici’s!

But here’s the important part.

The pitch was thrown behind ian kinsler.

Ian kinsler, as you all know, is a jew, and not only a jew, but THE BEST jew in baseball.

I stand behind that also, so take that.

Now Jenks admitted that he threw it on purpose in retaliation to all of his teammates getting hit by texas IN THE PAST.

Who does that? I don’t hit you because of something you said a few weeks ago.

Mostly because i can’t cyber-slap you.

But that excuse is total poop.

I know why he threw it.

Because Ian is jewish, and Jenkz is trying to start anti-semitism in the us today.

It is now necessary to make the jump that Jenkz is at least an anti-semitist, and at the most to being a nazi.

Adolf Bobby Jenks.

ABJ

how clever.

here is ozzie's sign to the mound for jenkz to exterminate the jew. because we only have one that i know of

here is ozzie's sign to the mound for jenkz to exterminate the jew. because we only have one that i know of

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Zack Greinke, out of this world

May 5, 2009

This kid is amazing.

He turned my attention to him after his 2nd and 3rd starts which increased his scoreless streak over 30 games and had an amazing ERA, WHIP and K’s.

Now, he sits 6 starts in, at 6-0, 54 k’s, 0.4 ERA, .84 WHIP, and 6 hits per 9 innings.

Everyone knows how important wins, era, and k’s are.

But WHIP is actually an underrated stat along with h/9.

WHIP is walks and hits per inning pitched.

So basically, Zack lets less than one person on per inning pitched.

He’s had 3 complete games, with 2 shutouts, one of which came last night against a powerful Chicago white sox team.

He’a number one in baseball, including hitters and pitchers according to yahoo’s fantasy stats.

45 innings pitched, 2 earned runs.

Unheard of.

But the amazing thing is the backstory of Zack.

He had an article written about him in SI not too long ago, after he turned mine and the rest of the world’s heads towards him.

He came into the game as skilled as a young player can be, and dominated in his rookie season.

He became the royals pitcher of the year as a rookie.

It’s not really saying much, because its the royals, but a rookie doing that is still awesome.

Then he became unamused with the game.

It was boring to him, dominating at such a young age.

He even didn’t like pitching as much as hitting.

He felt like he was forced to become a pitcher.

He one time promised he’d throw a 50-mph curveball in the next inning he pitched.

50 mph is amazingly slow, kids in 5th grade can get that high with a fastball.

He threw it to Dmitri Young (what a perfect person to throw it to), and it looped in there slow as possible.

The mph reading?

50 on the dot.

He eventually had problems mentally and took a year or two off of baseball.

He had severe depression issues and finally sorted them out after a while.

He came back about 3 years later and continued his domination.

Now he puts the royals on his back, and is capable of making his own baseball league.

Like a blitz, but baseball.

He’d be the only one that didn’t cheat, and i’m sure he’d still dom the whole league.

He and nelson cruz should go together into the ZNBL.

Zack-Nelson Baseball League.

Where Fun Happens.

I can see it now.

What a stud.

What a stud.

This is actually the exact pitch where zack threw the 50-mph curveball.

But wait!?! Isn’t Dmitri’s bat broken?

Yes, it is. But Dmitri is so cocky he heard the comment from zacky and assumed he could hit that pitch with a broken bat so he tried.

And failed miserably.

"hey next time i'm gonna throw a 100 mph change-up." "Is that possible?" "Don't question me stupid catcher"

"hey next time i'm gonna throw a 100 mph change-up." "Is that possible?" "Don't question me stupid catcher"

What a rough guy.

Don’t mess with Zacky, or as he shall now be called, the Royal(e) with Cheese.

Pronounced roy-al.

This is a graph.

This is a graph.

It’s basically the red and pink dots versus the blue and green.

I hope the blue and green ones win, that’d be cool.

Actually this is some odd pitch chart that shows the break of all his pitches.

It’s good to have a graph like this, just in case you uneducated fools didn’t know.

See what i did there??????????????^________^

just in case.

as if he were named Justin Case.

Or Just Incase.

how ironic.